Monday, November 14, 2011

adoption? Is this what God is calling us to?

  Jon and i went to an adoption meeting to learn about the different types of adoption and finances.  It is really reassuring that financially it seems possible (which was Jons concern...like most men).
  For those of you that don't know this about me i have always felt God calling me and my family to adoption at some point.  After Jon and i got married we were trying to get pregnant for almost a year....by almost i mean i had an apt with an infertility Dr but the week before my apt i found out i was pregnant. But during that process i was looking into foster to adopt classes. At that time Jon didn't feel called to adoption (most men arent) but then got pregnant and was put on the back burner.
   which leads us to today.....what is God calling us to do? We feel financially, foster to adopt is our best choice right now and there is so much need for homes right now for children in our own states. So the other day someone placed a thought in my heart about a child with HIV....i know at some point God is wanting us to have a child with special needs just not sure what or when. I brought it up to Jon thinking he would freak out on me and say stuff like how can we afford medical bills, how can we handle a child that could die before we do, can we handle another child especially special needs, would Titus be neglected.......but instead he says "God places children in peoples lives for a reason"...... EXCUSE ME! what did you just say to me!.....i couldn't even talk the rest of the way home because i started to freak out....(. that's the funny thing about Jon and i there is always one person who freaks out) (the realistic person)....i then started thinking.....Can we handle another child? how can we afford this? am i going to be a good mother to 2 children? how would we  pay for insurance (since JOn and i own our own businesses)....would i be able to keep my new business going?.... the freaking out list keeps going!!!!! so i called a friend and said help me stop freaking out.....She states remember God will provide.....and that we need to focus on where he is leading us and what is financially smart but also if i were to get pregnant i wouldn't say "im not ready to have a baby right now" then my answer to adoption is im ready when ever you are God cuz thats what i would say if i were pregnant!!
    Im doing my research and asking alot of questions to familys who have adopted before and with special needs.
     Prayers from you guys if God is really calling us in this direction in this time in our lives. PRAYERS PRAYERS PRAYERS PLEASE!  

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